Lierre Keith, author of the anti-veganism best seller The Vegetarian Myth,proposes Grass-Fed Friday as a rebuttal to Meat-Free Monday:

I’m so tired of being told that a plant-based diet will save the planet. It won’t. It will only entail more drawdown of soil, rivers, species, and life. We need to get over the ideologically-induced ignorance of the vegetarian myth.

If we could increase soil organic matter even .5% on 75% of the worlds’ (devastated) rangelands, that would bring CO2 levels back down to 330 ppm. That’s all we need to do to save the planet. It’s so simple–repair what agriculture has destroyed. Put the appropriate ruminants back on restored grasslands.

So on Grass-Fed Fridays we would all gather up anyone who would listen–friends, family, colleagues, local farm bureau–and explain to them that ruminants and grass would:

* Spell the end of factory-farming

* Produce healthier food for humans

* Profoundly repair wildlife habitat

* Eliminate all pesticides and fertilizers, ending the dead zones in the oceans

* Stop catastrophic flooding along the Mississippi and other rivers

* Restore those rivers to life by leaving them their water

* Create immediate income for farmers and revive rural communities

* Stop global warming

That makes it sound easier than her book does, which calls for the end of civilization to save the planet. Civilization-free Fridays has a decent ring to it, but we can’t exactly dismantle civilization for a day and then re-build it in time for the next. I like that Keith is considering more realistic tactics and I admire the chutzpah of designating Friday as a special meat eating day, since Friday is a meat-avoiding day for some Christians. But it’ll be hard to beat Paul McCartney’s slogan: “Meat-free Monday, it’s a fun day.”

If you don’t know much about meat, Grass-Fed Fridays sounds like an ultra-vegan day of eating your own lawn. So maybe the slogan should subvert that twigs and berries image. Something like, “If they eat grass, we’ll roast their ass.” But, you know, classier.

Damn it, Paul, we need your poetry here. If the entire world can skip meat on Mondays for you, surely you can eat a steak on Fridays for us!