Laurel Long became vegan as a teenager and was soon active in animal rights activism. Spreading the good vegan news became one of her most valued pastimes; she wrote letters to the editor and columns to encourage people to go vegan, including this one, in which she explains why she chose the compassionate diet: 

I suppose my activism “career” began when I developed adequate enough repulsion at the abusive animal industries to break out of my shell and began to use my voice for those billions who cannot speak out for themselves. While I’d like to be able to say I became active (and likewise vegan) immediately upon reading about and witnessing pictures of the tremendous suffering animals endure, that would not be accurate. It was a year or so before I stopped eating meat and another couple before I ditched milk, eggs, and cheese for good. And it was even longer still before I hooked up with local animal rights groups.

There were powerful reasons behind my decision to become a vegan activist. The animal industries carefully shield the realities of how the dozen eggs ended up in that flimsy cardboard container. Perhaps that is because of the outcry that would ensue if consumers knew egg-laying hens spend their entire lives in cages so small there is not enough room for them to even flap their wings. Or that factory-farmed breeder pigs live in crates that prohibit them from taking more than one step forward and ever turning around. Or that tail-docking, debeaking, and dehorning-mutilations performed without any painkiller are standard industry practices. Or…

I could go on listing the horrors of animal agriculture for at least ten more pages (literally!), but instead, I’d like to encourage you to get active. Simply by committing to writing letters to the editor, showing friends and family films exposing the truth behind animal agriculture, creating library displays, or distributing pro-vegetarian leaflets for just one hour a week, we can start to remove the bloody veil draped over every animal product we buy.

If you’re not already vegetarian, commit to making the transition (and check out TryVeg.com for a free Vegetarian Starter Guide). If you’re already veg, nix the dairy (just imagine no more sour milk stenches in the house!) and eggs. And, if you’re already vegan, get active. My biggest regret is not doing so sooner. Don’t make it yours, too.

But despite her past efforts to help usher in a vegan world, Laurel is no longer vegan herself. In this interview, she explains why.

What got you into veganism?

I have always cared deeply about non-human animals. As a child, when I found out the Chicken McNugget I was eating was made out of a former living being, I was horrified. So when I started exploring factory farming online, I was outraged. I was already vegetarian because I didn’t want any animal to have to die for my food; being vegan was the next logical step, and what all the vegetarian magazines and websites suggested I do.

Can you summarize your vegan activism career?

I was lacto-ovo vegetarian for five years throughout my teen years, though I was 90% vegan most of that time. My senior year of high school, I fully committed myself to animal rights (AR) and went 100 percent vegan. I was vegan for six years.

As a vegan, I was very, very involved in the (AR) community. I have interned or volunteered with several AR organizations in the area where I live. I have spent hours on the streets encouraging people to go vegan, as well as writing letters to the editor asking people to consider “trying veg.”

I have written articles for classes on the topic of animal rights, tying it into philosophy, sociology and women’s studies. As a teenager, I did interviews with notable vegans for a Vegetarian Teen website. My senior year high school internship was with an AR organization, and when I went off to college, I started an AR club on campus. I insisted the main focus of it be encouraging others to be vegan. The essay I wrote for my college application was about how I planned to work to bring about a vegan world.

I have also attended multiple AR conferences and gone to anti-circus and anti-vivisection protests. I have tried to convert my own friends to veganism and held a job within the vegan community.

What were some of your favorite vegan talking points when you were trying to convert people?

I liked to ask people if they would eat their favorite cat or dog. I also would describe in vivid detail the horrendous factory farm operations, how pigs have their tails docked, egg-laying hens are stuffed in cages so small they can’t even spread their wings, etc.

As a vegan you wrote that your biggest regret was not becoming active in animal rights sooner. That’s similar to what some vegans say, that veganism is the best decision they ever made, and they wish they had gone vegan earlier. Why did you regret not being an activist sooner, and how do you see it differently now?

Well, I was welcomed into a new community when I became vegan, the AR one. I believed I had found friends who shared my passion for justice.

While vegans do believe in justice, they’re going about it in a way that cannot work!

Vegans often equate eating animal products with rape or slavery. Did you ever feel this way? Do you find the comparison problematic now?

Yeah, I have supported a comparison between eating factory-farmed animal products and the Nazi holocaust in the past. Today, I still don’t have a problem with these comparisons; my ethics haven’t changed, I’ve just learned what I have to eat to function. I don’t know why the world was designed so we have to eat animals, but we do.

Factory farming, however, needs to be abolished.

Why did you leave veganism?

Needless to say, I never thought I would stop being vegan, much less eat meat. However, I was experiencing major depression that did not improve no matter what I did. Someone I deeply cared about refused to talk to me anymore because of how negative I was. I couldn’t even go to school or hold down a job. I became more and more depressed and had to drop out of college. 

After this, I was never able to fully get back into the AR community again, no matter how much I tried, because I simply did not have the stamina.

Do you think veganism was connected to your depression?

Absolutely. For the first several months I was vegan, I really did feel good. However, I soon became severely depressed. When I started eating meat, the depression vanished. 

What gave you the idea to try eating meat?

I met Lierre Keith at a small feminist gathering on the East coast several years ago. She encouraged me to eat meat, assuring me I would feel better. Since I had nothing else to lose, I got up all my courage and tried it. As if by magic, I felt better than I had in well over a decade. The change was absolutely incredible, and a few months after eating meat again, I went back to school full time. That was a year and a half ago.

I recently interviewed an ex-vegan who started eating meat again after reading The Vegetarian Myth. Why is that book so effective?

Well, I started eating meat prior to actually reading Keith’s book. However, the book is effective because the analysis of agriculture just plain makes sense. Humans were never designed to eat grains and, indeed, it is grain consumption that is destroying the landbase! If the book wasn’t powerful, vegans wouldn’t be making a huge fuss over it.

Do you consider yourself a speciesist now? If so, how do you justify it, considering that you once thought it was as bad as racism and sexism?

I still have the same commitment to justice, liberation, and compassion as when I was vegan. I’ve just learned that the human body was never designed to be vegan, and I’ve learned that the hard way.

I think there is an extremely small segment of the population that seems to do okay on vegan diets. This percentage has to be small; think about how few people become vegan, and how many of these people go back to consuming animal products. However, for some miniscule percentage of people, their bodies just don’t bottom out. Perhaps if humans lived several hundred years they would; I don’t know.

Though there may be some small segment of the population that can function on a purely plant-based diet, some of us will die on one — my mind was trying to kill me while I was on one. Besides which, I would say killing the planet is pretty fucking hierarchical. 

Do you wish you were one of those people who can thrive on a plant-based diet?

Yes, I sometimes do. However, there are lessons about the nature of life I wouldn’t have learned had I been able to survive on a plant-based diet. Additionally, I was a rather harsh judge of meat eaters, so having to eat meat myself has allowed me to become less judgmental.

Do vegans seem to have a special contempt for ex-vegans?

I think so. I mean, I probably did when I was vegan. It’s hard to see someone who you believe “should know better” return to meat eating. I always thought they were just weak or liked the taste of meat too much to give it up.

Do you miss anything about veganism?

Absolutely. I miss the AR community I was part of during my time as a vegan. There was a real warmth to it, at least to the people in my area.

It was also easier to explain to oneself and others how my food was (supposedly) “reducing suffering” as a vegan. And being vegan is just much more hip among young women than eating the animal-based foods our bodies actually need to function.